Bring on Liverpool and try to remember the way back to Villa Park.
We’re back, and about time too. After an eternity of people who normally wouldn’t have a clue lecturing you about Football Coming Home, Messi the Goat (whatever that might mean), they might not have much in the way of human rights but they know how to throw a World Cup and a load of other stuff they’ll forget about for the next two years, the proper match is back. Think of it as like pubs once Christmas is out of the way.
Unfortunately, we’ve got Liverpool on Boxing Day, which is one of those games when the circus comes to town. It can’t be three o’clock because the Villa are at home and we can’t really enjoy it because Liverpool will be here. they’re not doing as well as they think they should, although that’s not saying much because Liverpool never do as well as they think they should. Expect to see daytrippers, tourists, gloryhunters and the occasional Scouser all wandering down Witton Lane before the match, taking photos, buying half and half scarves and wondering where they can get their money changed.
They’ve got James Milner, who they got on a free transfer. We’ve got their old player Philippe Coutinho, who they sold for £142 million. You can work out who did the best out of those two deals. They haven’t got a World Cup winner, though. Then again, we very likely won’t have either, as our very own Argentinian folk hero and star of social media will probably still be at home sobering up, and before anyone has a bad word to say about how he behaved, don’t bother. He’s ours, so it’s allowed.
If Martinez does play, we’ve got a decent chance of winning because Liverpool aren’t up to much. If he isn’t playing, the alternative is a bit worrying to say the least. Naturally we’ve managed to get a player or two injured during a month’s holiday and don’t be surprised if another one blows themselves up on a cracker or gets turkey poisoning the day before.
Three points and we’ll be heading up the table. Win nine-nil and we’ll be above Liverpool.