Leeds, here we come. Yippee.
God knows why we have to play this one on a Thursday but money’s probably got something to do with it. Anyway, off we go to Elland Road and a visit to what must surely be the world champions at self-promotion. Some clubs might like to call themselves Big or have the best fans, but the way in which Leeds have managed to convince people that they’re a footballing superpower has been nothing short of miraculous.
This, don’t forget, is a club who have spent more time out of the top flight than in it, and whose most successful period was achieved by what might politely be called gamesmanship or if you prefer, cheating and bribery. Allegedly. And yet they got the full Sleeping Giant Re-awakens when they finally got promoted thanks to a managerial genius who still hasn’t won anything in Europe and who got a fair play award for something that happened in a match where he’d been booked in the first half and his team had committed a number of assaults on the opposition. But he pretended not to speak English and sat on a bucket, so he must have been a genius and all that was overlooked.
And now he’s gone, and his replacement is some obscure American fresh from the global Red Bull franchise. Let’s see how long he lasts, and whether it’s a return to the hilarious eight managers in three years days of old. Apart from that there’s nothing much to say about Leeds, except that they’ve got a couple of players who have trouble staying upright in a mild breeze and some very silly haircuts.
We, on the other hand, are now a team of unbeatable supermen. The Covid cases might return but no matter; we have a watertight defence, a midfield full of invention and workrate, the best player in the league on current form plus Danny Ings and Ollie Watkins working together in perfect harmony just like everyone always said they would. The result is inevitable, and you can take that whichever way you want.